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We live in strange times. We are the generation which has been the most connected of all our predecessors but when we want to communicate what we feel, our most intimate thoughts, it's hard to open up.
Lately, I have been hearing this song-Lovely by Khalid and Billie Eilish. With their beautiful and haunting vocals, the song evokes a sense of despair & of finding comfort in being alone. For me, the most touching part is the chorus, their voices almost intermingling, creating a chamber of sadness that feels like it has lived, it's universal leaving its imprint in your mind and soul.
Every time this song plays, it makes me reminisce about love. How two souls finds each other after lifetimes, going through pain and transformation, sometimes just to meet or love from afar.
When you gaze into their eyes, it's like you have known them from another life. Your heart feels like it has met its match after years of longing for its other half. Their laugh puts a smile to your face like nothing does. It's not the love thats toxic or selfish, but the kind that arrests your heart when you never thought it was possible to love someone so much. It's selfless & even in its silence, it can make you believe in the magic of the universe.
You feel like you are finally meant to be but maybe it's not the right time to be together. Life has both of you at different turns & you realise- this is not just about finding each other but of finding yourself too.
It's a journey towards peeling back all those layers where deep seated trauma resides, which shields you from being truly vulnerable with yourself. It keeps your pain insulated, simultaneously making you feel it's tremors that like an earthquake, permeates everything you do & touch. It's finding that even in your chaos, you never lost the ability to bask in your love. And that your love can sustain you in your shadows and light too.
It's about abandoning years of conditioning, re-parenting yourself and alchemising that pain with which you can write the next chapters of your life. It's believing that you can forgive yourself and forego the burden of everyone's expectations you have subconsciously become. You can rebuild. You don't have to be afraid anymore.
Even though the song has a dark sarcasm to it, I feel it's also a song of strength. Before we truly love someone, it's about feeling whole in solitude too. It's about walking a difficult path to self love and recovery, no matter how many thorns & mental prisons you need to demolish in the process. It's living, fighting these internal battles, even when all hope seems extinguished.
As you grow through life and find yourself at a crossroads of self love and discovery, never stop believing in how amazing you can be, how there is nothing you can't accomplish and that as long as your heart burns with the fire of resolve, you can fight your fears.
And someday when that fire is finally bright enough it might just manifest the love universe once brought to you & bring you home.
PS: Sharing the Spotify link of this song- https://open.spotify.com/album/2sBB17RXTamvj7Ncps15AK
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